jacks.jukebox

Glastonbury is over for another year. Whether it’s a “middle-class band virtue signalling”, or “the line-up not being as good as back in my day !”, people love to complain about the greatest music festival on the planet. Well I’m here to fight back.

In a week where we’ve seen a wannabe fascist threaten to boycott the BBC for daring to allow people to question his beliefs (that’s democracy baby !), it continues to prove to me and many others why it is the pinnacle of British culture.

Their coverage of Glastonbury can only be praised. So many artists from countless genres are available at your fingertip. Whether you wanna throw it back to your rave days of the 90s with Orbital, or dance along to one of the biggest current pop stars in the world (Dua Lipa), there’s something for all of you.

As we come to the end (fingers crossed) of a government which has looked to diminish creativity at any given opportunity, we get this reminder of just how powerful and uniting music is.

I’m no super fan of Coldplay, but bringing together over 100,000 people in a field is something every politician can only dream of. Even the smallest act of the weekend bought joy to more people than Greedy Rishi has in the last few years.

But despite this, there are people miserable enough to complain. These screenshots I’m about to show you are pretty hilarious. I guarantee none of these people have ever been to a music festival or carnival or any celebration of human creativity. And it shows.

I really didn’t want to justify these with a response, but that first one by ‘_noycey’ is just too good not too. Apparently having multiple no. 1 albums featuring anti-fascist tunes AND a Glastonbury headline set heavily focused on anti-fascist messaging doesn’t constitute anti fascism work?? Really? Please let me know what else they should do… Start a hashtag?

Anyway enough of this negativity, I’m getting dragged down to their level here. Let’s focus on the positives, here are JacksJukebox’s 10 must-see performances from Glastonbury ’24.

One last note, REMEMBER TO VOTE ON THURSDAY. The only way to stop politicians from ignoring young people is by increasing that turnout percentage. SO VOTE !

10 must-see performances from Glastonbury 2024

10. Avril Lavigne

Avril Lavigne rocked up and rocked out on the Other Stage on Sunday night. On a night where the Pyramid headliner, SZA, struggled to draw a crowd, the same can not be said for the ‘Sk8er boi’ artist. According to reports it was one of the most packed stages of the whole weekend as she delivered tune after tune after tune for an hour straight. Would she have been a better choice to headline the Pyramid? Maybe, but it was damn good enough on the Other Stage.

9. Orbital

The first of a few acts that I didn’t even include in my itinerary. Just goes to show the unpredictable beauty of Glastonbury. Although maybe I should have predicted this. Whether it was actress Tilda Swinton opening and closing their set with a trippy, hallucinating speech, or Mel C truly taking the crowd back to the 90s, this set had it all. Legendary electronic duo Orbital had the crowd in the palm of their hands for the whole hour with my only critique being just how good it could have been if it was later at night. But you can hardly blame them for that.

8. Soft Play

Now this IS a band I highlighted in my itinerary. And they were even better than I was expecting. After a few years away, they’re back and you can see the evolution they have been through both as performers and men. The pure energy they bring to the stage is unmatched, and even off the stage apparently. Drummer and vocalist, Isaac Holman, venturing into the crowd to tell the story of why he has no hi-hat on his drum set maybe being the highlight.

7. Baxter Dury

Another one that exceeded my already high expectations. Although being a big fan of his music, I’ve never actually seen a clip of him playing live. He wasn’t what I was expecting, in a good way. Dancing like a praying mantis and smiling like a sadistic sociopath, his slightly off-putting stage presence matched with his bands melancholic sound made it a top 10 performance. Quick shout out to Fabienne Debarre on the backing vocals and beats, she really stood out.

6. Confidence Man

I predicted this electro-pop duo from Australia to be one of the acts of the weekend, and I wasn’t wrong. Janet Planet (great name) of the band stated that “The Confidence Man live show is midway between musical theatre, art and just being completely wasted” and I couldn’t describe it better if I tried. I’ve been waxing lyrical about them ever since I checked out their performance at Glasto in 2022. They were one of the highlights then and they’re one of the highlights now. Check them out. They are so close to the line of being terrible that they’re in fact amazing.

5. Noname

The only entry on this list that I had never listened to before this weekend. Fair to say she has at least one new fan. This rapper from Chicago didn’t need anything other than a mic and a soulful jazz band behind her. Drawing a massive crowd which left her abit in shock at times, she blissfully guided her way through song after song. Noname? No problem.

4. The Streets

Sir Mike Skinner was always gonna be in my top 5. ‘Original Pirate Material’ is one of my favourite albums of all time and Mike Skinner puts on such a unique show. A highlight being him getting out into the crowd so that he could wave a flag with his face on it. I saw a comment claiming Mike Skinner is the British Eminem. Might sound crazy at first, but honestly I get it. I’d love to see The Streets get the opportunity to headline the Pyramid stage one year, I’m sure they could pull it off.

3. The Mary Wallopers

They just had to be top 3 didn’t they. The traditional Irish sounds, the more modern sing alongs, the pretty impeccable comedy and the open hatred towards the monarchy and the rich. For someone who had never really listened to them, but heard LOTS about them from my Irish mates, I was not disappointed. I feel bigger things to come for these Irish menaces.

2. IDLES

Whilst watching this performance I thought there was no chance they’d be placed anywhere other than no.1. But you’ll see why that didn’t happen in a minute. This was a performance worthy of headlining the Pyramid Stage. The energy in the crowd, the passion on the stage, and the 8 year old kid with a timeless mullet. It had everything. Lead singer, Joe Talbot, telling the mulleted kid (named Flynn if you were wondering) to “get the fuck off my stage” maybe being the stand out moment. Don’t worry it was in a loving manner. Don’t be surprised if these lot headline the Pyramid in 2027 to match the release of another no.1 album. I gotta say I had higher hopes for Fontaines D.C. over IDLES coming into this, and they were good don’t get me wrong, but I think we saw who the stronger live band at the minute is.

1. Justice

Justice being number 1 just goes to show what I know. I didn’t even mention them in my itinerary. But they stole the show on Sunday night. Performing at the same time as SZA, London Grammar, and The National (who deserve a quick shout out), this French electronic duo had by far the largest and most energetic crowd. I watched it not knowing too much about them, but found myself gripped for the whole 90 minutes. The tunes, the stage and lighting show, the best crowd of the weekend. I just couldn’t put it anywhere other than number 1. I looked at it like this, which performance would I have most liked to be in the crowd for. IDLES were close, but this was the full package. Also, their tune with Tame Impala, ‘Neverender’, might just be the song of 2024.

So there you have it, Glastonbury is done for another year. I hope you enjoyed my little coverage of it. I’ll be back next year to do the same all over again. And I’ll keep going until they give me a free ticket. The truth is that’s the whole reason JacksJukebox exists. The moment I get that free ticket I’m outta here.

Don’t forget to vote on Thursday. Up the Glastonbury, fuck the tories, and pray for the three lions. Peace.